Here I am.. to update my blog.. or should I say that I actually just wanted to find a place to release myself.. It seems that I have no one to talk to.. no one cares to talk to me.. no one cares either I'm dead or alive.. if that is so.. why am I still here at this place?
I have had enough of all the comments of others.. u r emo.. u r like this de la.. u r like that de la.. and the list goes on.. have you ever try to stand in my shoe? have you ever think from my point of view? have you ever care for it before giving out any comments? or you are just there and did nothing but pointing fingers?
I think I have some minor depression or things like that.. Again, I am reacting abnormal. And this is torturing.. sad..
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Someone asked me a question.
A question that start with "if"
A question that I would not want to answer
A question that makes my heart sorrow
I answered, "I have never thought of it"
I can't recall whether I have thought of it or not
But I know what will my answer be
Though, I do not wish to answer that question
Will it truly take place?
How will it be?
My mind is filled with all these questions.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
It is as if something is missing within me
And I am still wondering
What is that?
I am searching
Searching for something
Something that I truly needed
What is that?
I seem know.. but the other moment, I seem not knowing it
Argh.. stop those craps!
*searching for answer*
Have been having mild diarrhea for two days.. huhu.. What happened to my digestive system? *searching for answer*
This few days, I slept like usual. But my mind is unusual. It keeps operating even when I am "hibernating". I guess the CPU usage is up to 99%. It better stop operating that much. Else it gonna explode soon. STOP it! Any way that I can make it rest? huhu.. *searching for answer*
Finally, I end up searching hard.. lol~
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
The year 2010 will soon be over in less than two months time
This is the year that I have least expectations
but much has happened and took place
I looked back,
I see myself running and running
Hardly stopped to catch my breathe
I slowed down at times
but I pushed myself harder each time
trying to strive though it
trying to overcome it
trying to finsh the race
here I choose to stop
how long will it be?
Or I should say,
I am trying to get back on the right track
crawling back to the track that belongs to me
I have lost my way
On one hand, I care
On the other hand, I hated to care
but I still care
what are those craps??
can't I just learn to let go?
I am hoping for a fresh start..
God.. lead me!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Recently I seem to back to this crossroad
Do not know which way to go
Should I continue on with the straight path
or should I start a new journey on another path
Which is the path designed for me?
I have been observing
I have been wondering
I have been asking
But no respond
If I happen to choose another path
I have to face new things
People may just not understand
People may just condemn me for that decision
But who cares?
Lord, I truly needed your guidance
Show me your way
Both ways are just not easy
My family needed me
My mom yearns for me to go back
Is there anything left for me here?
It seems to be the time
But will it happen that way?
I am just so confused.. on which path to choose..